PSA* 🚨
Inadvertently two of my last three posts have had the common themes of isolation and monotony. Repeatedly, I have diagnosed myself as suffering from a lack of stimulation, and then following it up with a persuasive argument that this in fact is not the case and I am very happy to be doing what I am doing.
Now, however, I am tired of this narrative and putting it to bed. The exam doesn't care about my feelings and there is no point romanticizing it. Preparing for an exam is not a personality trait, and I need to learn to respect the process without being absorbed by it. I have already chosen to spend a significant portion of my youth inside the house, and it won't help if I waste time finding words to describe how lonely it is making me feel and then switch 180 to bathe in the glory of knowledge am acquiring every day. It is what it is.
I don't usually compare myself to people but I need to remember that it's a huge world out there with plenty of amazing people who are working harder for goals more worthy than mere employment.
*PSA: Personal Service Announcement
there's nothing wrong with you whinning about isolation. it's a tough path you've taken and if romanticising it enables you to hustle harder, do it. it's a vain world out there, in the end no one's actions mean anything in the grand scheme of things, don't humble yourself over it. and well hope you're keeping sane and working hard ��
ReplyDeletethanks for this, i hope you're fine and working hard too
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